HATRED

I hate UKM!!!!!!

H A T E H A T E H A T E H A T E...............

sophisticated science subjects in freaking BM is a mess...

离岛

又是时候离开这个岛了，
好想依旧平时的习惯，继续睡觉，日上三竿也无所谓。
只是，少了一份睡意，多了一份清醒。

醒来看看外面的景物，
一切都如往常。
喜鹊为了生活儿到处飞；
蜥蜴很悠闲地在地上晒太阳；
我也如常地刷牙洗脸，第一时间喝蛋白粉麦片当早餐，
只是，少了一份平静，多了一份不舍。

算了一下，
这已经是第 n 次离岛了，
只是，少了一份坚强，多了一份情感。

每次离岛，
心情总是沉重的，
就像不懂事的小孩得不到心爱的玩具一样，
即无奈，又只能低头。
只是，少了一份幼稚，多了一份成熟。

有时想着，
自己真的那么爱家吗？
答案：好像不是，却不能完全说不是。
只是，少了一份肯定，多了一份质疑。

觉得自己很不成熟，
因为离开，可以让自己成长，
为自己的前途铺路，
但自己的心却呐喊不舍，
很不得体。
只是，少了一份温暖，多了一份忧虑。

人的心，
总是想着家的吧？
那，我的不舍也是人之常情。

只是，离岛令我觉得好像失去了一些什么，
不过，我还是原来的我。

时间不早了，
饭也快吃完了，
就在此向这可爱的岛道别。

八个星期后，我会再回来!

伯乐

今天是公共假期，爸妈都清闲，所以今早一起吃点心当早餐。虽然说是吃早餐啦，但其实也不早了，将近午餐时间了。吃了点心就去拜神。今天难得下雨，所以天气不会酷热，谢天谢地。


今天算是家庭日，午餐也跟爸妈吃。吃着午餐的时候，谈到了 Prof. Yuen 。妈说他很欣赏我，叫我得好好珍惜欣赏自己的人。


有谁不希望自己被肯定，被欣赏？这么多年以来，身边出现的每一个人都可能是我的伯乐。而这么多次，自己瞎猜的人都一一令我失望。每一次的机会总换来一个假希望。


说的也是，古人有云：“世有伯乐，然后有千里马。千里马常有；但伯乐不常有。”，始终，要遇到一个欣赏自己的人已经是一件难事了，何况是一个想提拔你的人呢？看来，我下个学期的假期应该安守本分，虚心向学，在他的实验室工作久一点。这样，自己可以增加知识，丰富经验。他对我总算宽容，而他的宽容令我受宠若惊，更让我感到惭愧，因为自己的惰性竟然强过自己的上进心。不可以，我必须改过我的观点。这样我就可以过着很充实的假期。我很期待下一个假期，也希望教授他真的是我的伯乐，可以在茫茫的前路点燃一盏指引方向的明灯。


但在爱情上，如果我也可以有个伯乐从旁指点，细心教诲，那该有多好？


就像林宥嘉的《伯乐》里的歌词所唱的：“爱你的那一个，伤你的那一个，谁才是你爱情中的伯乐？放弃了这一个，然后等待着下一个，最后哪一个让你最舍不得？”。


可是，我没爱过，也没伤过，那又怎样知道谁是我“爱情中的伯乐”？


所以说，爱情真不是我的囊中物。还是自己爱自己来得比较实际。

Random

A friend asked me how come I do not write any posts lately and I answered this blog is only active during the semesters. But, it occurs to me that it's a little bit unfair to this blog of mine, haha, as it usually engulfs my rage and sadness but seldom expresses my happiness.

It's time for me to write in English, because I find my English is rusting nowadays. I had trouble writing a sentence to comment in a friend's blog, damn! This could be due to too much exposure to Mandarin as I have just finished watching "Beyond the Realm of Conscience" A.K.A. 宫心计 from TVB. Fascinated by the unique ancient palace language, my friends and I have been using them in our conversation in Facebook, crazy huh?

Today is not my day; I woke up at 10am and felt that I am in a low-energy state. After taking my breakfast as usual, i start to have stomach discomfort and I fell sick then. I spent my whole evening sleeping. God, the feeling sucks! I could not do anything because I feel very tired and my mind made sleeping its priority, one day has been wasted for nothing. I was supposed to workout my deltoids today. My workout has to be postponed.

Nevertheless, falling sick today makes me feel grateful, well, even though I am sick. At least, I could really rest well at home. If I were to fall sick in Bangi, I am doomed. I will be burdened by the daily chores even when I am sick. I am lucky to fall sick here. Well, that's the advantage of being at home: you will not be forsaken.^^

压迫

外面绵绵的细雨，打在屋顶上滴滴答答的，天气不会太冷，但这场雨足以让平时的热气撤退。这是一个很适合安稳入睡的晚上。

但，我却失眠了。凌晨三点钟，我聆听雨滴的足迹，但心从来没被雨滴的凉气平复下来。

最近发现到自己好像愈来愈不像自己。万锦杨到底发生了什么事？为什么每逢晚上，我头脑还是特别清醒？而且还会很不由自主地想起很多的东西。想起很多自己控制不到的东西，也想起一些自己可以控制的事情，但却不知所措。想起那些遗失的美好，想起自己这一路走来的蜕变，想起一些自己做过一些错的决定，想起自己的缺点，想着当下，想着她。想着想着又会把时光往前加速，想到自己的未来，未来的生活，未来的爱情，未来到底会怎样？

明天还有考试。若是以前的我，早就逼自己睡了。最近，觉得自己对考试看得没像以前那么重了。这是好事吗？我不懂。或许我开始发现人生不再是考试那么单纯。

今晚的雨不大。奇怪的是，整个下午的天都灰灰的，但怎么下的是绵绵的细雨呢？这场雨，似乎像我的心一样，被压迫着。我的心，其实很想狂奔；但往往许多里里外外的因素，造成我有一种无形的压迫，就像布满天空的乌云不能下一场倾盆大雨的无奈。

突然我好希望顿时下一场好大好大的雨，好让成千上万的雨珠为我的压迫感出一口气，让我可以聆听我的心声，更勇敢的找到真正的自己。

考试

日子一天一天的走了，我还停留在原地。
来得及吗？还有五科嘞。。。

这次的考试令我感到很渺茫，但惟有抱着进取的态度去面对。
面对，并不代表不会害怕。
害怕，我真的不知所措，可是，我只能跟自己说“尽力吧”！

心动，是好事吗？

我有着一颗不认识爱情的心。二十一年来，爱情从来没被放在心上。是我的心被别的东西装满了；还是我不懂得该把爱情摆设在心的哪个部分，这些我都不知道。曾经错过爱情，就是擦肩而过，可是没檫出火花。但也没什么奇怪，因为我的心对爱情还是很陌生。

上个学期的这个时候（温习周），曾经为它感到烦恼，甚至无法专心温习。考试将近，怎么这次又是在这种关键时刻，我的心又被风吹起了波浪？心动是好是坏？不过，这些好，坏都言之过早。葡萄才刚被收割，酒桶刚刚被钉成。葡萄需要被碾碎后放进酒桶里，盖好后摆放于适当的温度及湿气的暗房，慢慢酝酿，才会变成红酒。红酒的口感及味道多多少少受葡萄的素质影响，但酝酿时期是个关键。我相信，爱情也是如此。

所以，先好好温习吧！

《无题》

跟她聊了天，觉得好高兴。

不知道为什么。。。反正就是高兴。

明天回家了，感觉真好。大家加油吧！

Moody + Confused = Unhappy?

Exam is getting closer as each time the calender flips to a new page, and the pressure gradually builds up with an inversely proportional correlation with the time left. As mentioned on the previous post, I would describe myself as a potato couch lately; what I do the most is just eating and sleeping. Sloth totally consumes me.

I am left with the last assignment and this does not even excite me to quickly finish it in order to clear my to-do-list. Biometry and experimental design is not of my subject of interest, so I admit that my bad attitude would block that from my mind. But, the struggle is that, even if I dislike the subject, I still have to sit for the exam, cause there is no way out; it's a compulsory subject for a Biochemistry student. This is not my semester as many weird subjects are on the list: C programming ( Gosh, I totally hate this! I am so not a fan of programming and damn, I have to take this, it's compulsory too!), Recombinant DNA Technology and Biometry and Experimental Design. Flipping through all these notes makes me feel devastated as I don't know most of the contents, especially C programming. I need a very much longer time to really get to know what are all these subjects about and time is running out, but laziness persists in me. I must quickly switch into study mode! *click*

Today is the last session of the TDR lab, better known as the Recombinant DNA Technology practical. Today the session ends 2 hours earlier as we are allowed to visit the Malaysian Genomic Institute(MGI). The visit is quite helpful in assisting me to have an insight of what I really want in future. MGI carries out many researches, namely protein expression, microarray, DNA sequencing and so on. DNA sequencing is totally out of the list as I hate to work with computers from morning to evening. Protein expression, maybe, as it involves microbes. Microarray, quite relevent to cancer research, but I just don't know why am I not interested. Suddenly, I am starting to feel that I am not so into lab work... Previously, I thought I would prefer lab work rather than everything else as I have had bad experiences working with humans (customers), who keeps on bothering me with many unnecessary problems and I though that lab work would bring it to the minimum level. However, currently I have to admit that my thoughts are starting to shake as I find myself getting a little tired for being in the lab for long hours. Imagine in future, it's going to be from monday to friday(or even saturday in private companies), and for how many years would it lasts? Gosh, I am sweating even when I am only thinking of the situation.

So, what's next? Why am I so fickle-minded and unpredictable? I am starting to worry as I only have 3 more semesters to really think about it before I come to another decision-making threshold, again...Think properly.

Laziness

After so many posts, i realized that my blog has become a mandarin dictionary. Time to switch back to English, for a change, at least.

Why am i so lazy lately? I am craving for sleep, even after getting sufficient sleep. I grab every single chances of evening naps, and yet can't have enough of them. Further more, they are not really naps; they could last for 2 hours+ if my free time permits. ArrHHH, I am so lazy lately.

The weather is getting scorching hot lately, never improved eversince I am back from Penang after the Raya holidays, only gets worse day by day. This type of weather makes people feels dizzily tired, even when you are just sitting there, doing nothing but surfing the net. Is this the perfect explanation for my sluggishness?

The semester is ending soon. Time to start getting serious with my studies, though I am absolutely reluctant of that. Looking forward to going back to my little but fantastic island.

《我不是你想象那么勇敢》

有时觉得梁文音的这首歌很适合我，可以说是唱出了我的心声。
有时真的觉得自己不是真的坚强及勇敢，只是戴上面具来隐藏心中的恐与慌。

诉说心情

忙了两个月，现在终于放慢了脚步，当回原本万锦杨。


昨晚，会是我一生难忘的一晚。在三千位观众面前表演，人生会有多少次机会呢？或许昨晚就是唯一一次的机会。化完妆后集体流泪的经验，哭得稀里哗啦后，又忙着去补妆，这种经验是独一无二的。

这个星期，真的很忙。忙到没见到housemates，忙到每晚只睡大约五个小时，忙到不断自问为什么要参加这活动，忙到很想放弃。

回顾面试，那时的我完全不会演戏，可是却误打误闯地被选为演员。在过程中，一开始，我超爱去练习，因为觉得很好玩。到拍戏正式开始时，我的噩梦也就开始了。被老师们挑戏，挑来挑去都是挑着同样的东西，因为我改变不到自己的演艺方式，很僵硬，不自然。挑到老师也感到不耐烦的同时，我自己的信心也渐渐磨损了。当时不断收到批评，但无论怎么改，都改不到老师要的东西，那种心情是从来没有经历过的。那时，每逢练习，我都会感到厌倦。可是，我还是得走下去，以那剩下的信心继续撑下去。一直到上个星期彩排时，又再次受打击。在六七十人面前被老师批评，这就像在我的伤口上撒盐般的痛。可是，我知道老师的出发点是好的，所以才有力量坚持下去，才会有昨晚的成就。

昨晚的心情分享环节，老师要我们回顾整个过程。随着音乐的播放，我边想边流泪了。每个老师都出来说出自己的感受，场面感人，连一些助导及工作人员也跟着一起哭。秋坪老师出来说话的时候，让我更感动，因为我知道她在说着的那个人是我。到昨晚那个时候，我才知道，其实我应该衷心感谢她，以及其他老师当时对我的坦诚批评。是他们令我成长的。真的很感谢老师们的耐心及包容，也谢谢明杰老师跟我分享他的经历，让我能够勇敢地站起来。谢谢战友们的支持及鼓励，没有你们，我走不到那舞台上。PT30 是我们共同的回忆。

突然间，好想念这一切哦。可是，它已经是过去了。今天起，就当回自己吧！应该说，是变成更好的自己。希望大家日后还会有缘在聚。

或许，放松会比较好。。。

今天明杰老师挑第二幕，第四场的戏。整体感觉是紧张。可是，一开始，我却给不到紧张的感觉。为了营造紧张的感觉，明杰老师叫我跑一大圈后就立刻回去演，效果果然不同；大有改进。那时，觉得还蛮满意的，因为总算做到明杰老师要的东西，只是还有一些瑕疵需要注意，要再去改善。

但，被秋萍老师叫去挑第二幕，第二场的时候。都还没有真正开始挑，就被秋萍老师批评了。还是那老问题，就是我的演技根本塑造不出一个五十多岁老人的感觉。而且，整体就是有一种不自然的感觉，太不生活化。或许我的不自然会让她抓狂，因为听明杰老师说她是一个比较容易激动的人。所以，秋萍老师教我把东西放在背上，好让我自己相信自己是驼背的，是个老人。过后，秋萍老师又给我训话了。上个星期，我告诉她我的考试压力很大，所以不能很豪放的把专注力全放在演技上。看来我给她的理由一定让她叹气吧。对于他们这些专业艺人，自己的生活和演戏是绝对不能够混合在一起。可是，过后我自己才发现，我只是个学生，不是什么专业演员。我希望我的情况会被他们体谅，毕竟我是个毫无经验的新人，而且同时兼顾五个考试，还有活动也不是举手之劳的芝麻绿豆事。

她今天又跟我说回同样一番话，就是叫我放下自我中心，要演的不是自己；是剧里的角色。我就是不明白为什么我捉不到这点。我不是不明白，就是不知道要怎么做。

我回答她：“老师，我知道。我也很想进步，可是我越想进步，我就好像越进不到，反而后退了。”

她则说：“既然你知道会这样，怎么不能放松自己，不要逼自己那么紧呢？越去思考，越去故意安排就会越不自然。每个人都是从零开始啊。”

我又回答她：“可能是因为我是一个对自己要求比较高的人。"

我的名句又来了。对自己有要求，就好像是一种推动力。

但，秋萍老师的话让我反复自问我是否逼自己逼得太紧了呢？逼到我不能自然的去融入剧情，融入角色里面？不是应该对自己要求高才会有进步吗，怎么竟然出现反效果？又或许，我没什么天分？也许用一颗平常心来面对会比较好吧。。。

精神分裂。。。

朋友看了对我有所相劝，冷静看待我刚才的情绪后，才发现我干嘛要这样在意人家在说什么？他说我，我会死吗？他/她的烂嘴讲了我之后就会变好吗？

现在我好像在搞精神分裂似的，哈哈。。。

是啊，我得演技是差，是好笑啊，有时回想起来我自己也会笑啊，可是我已经用我有的时间，尽我所能了，所以也没什么好说的。要说的就只能说干嘛我与那个角色起不了共鸣，根本联系不到那种对的感觉，无论是肢体动作，或是精神上的，情绪上的那种感觉，演出来的时候，就是显得格格不入。可是，我还是得想一下要怎么样去改善。

这就意味着，万锦杨啊，你不是一个当明星的料，少发什么明星春秋大梦啦！还是当回那个原本的万锦杨比较踏实。奥斯卡奖根本不是我的命运，反而相比之下，我拿到诺贝尔奖的机率可能远远地超越了我拿奥斯卡奖的机率哦！

心绪。复杂

不是伤心，可是就是心里感觉到不爽。不是被别人讲中，只是自己好像没什么勇气去面对自己的缺点。更不是生气，只是觉得怎么人会说出这样的话。虽然是事实，只是说出来也会让我有所困扰。不知道怎么形容现在的感觉；似生气非生气，似低落非低落，总之就是奇怪的感觉。

是啊，我是演得不自然，那又怎样？我管你是资深的，还是新人，那又怎样？你还不是靠经验才会有今天吗？有谁没有第一次？现在讲这句话的人很了不起吗？很厉害吧？这么厉害那你就别在这里演什么国大中秋舞台剧啊，干嘛还在这里埋没自己的资深演技呢？干嘛要这么苦了你自己，跟我这种演技超烂，烂到爆的人演呢？还会害你，或是害到别人笑场，拖累到你的成就。你不会去TVB啊？还是觉得自己配不上那种水准吗？那就去MediaCorp试一试啊！

对，你说的话，都是事实。我确实是演得很不自然，我确实是有很多莫名其妙的动作会让你们感觉到好笑，甚至连我自己也不知道为什么我会这么不自然，那么莫名其妙。可是，说这句话的人，你不觉得这样子在背后说人很缺德吗？每个人都有缺点。如果说，我会让你有一种不自在的感觉；或是我给不到你要的对手戏，那你就当面告诉我啊，这种东西不是应该靠合作关系，而大家是必须一起进步的吗？总好过你在背后说我，还要我从别人的口中听来，干嘛做人那么鬼祟？你当面跟我说，我可能会很坦然接受；但同样的话，经过第三者的口说出来，听了总让我感到反感。

无论如何，或许我真的不是当演员的料，没有你那种了不起的天分，但我会尽我所能去改善，我不会拖累你的，你放一万个心吧！

阿婆，您这样就走了一年。。。

阿婆，今天是您的死祭。这样，就过了一年。一年了，没见到您的日子已经有一年了。

虽然你已经不在我们身边，但我们仿佛都感觉到您的存在。每次回家，当我们一家人聚在一起的时候，都会不时地想起您。每次我们到外面吃煮炒时，我们总记得您那黑得像火炭的脸孔，一边吃，一边骂我们爱浪费钱。我们也记得你一骂，就至少会维持两个星期。每次我们吃蚝煎的时候，一定会大笑，因为我们想起你煎的蚝煎。您说：“蚝煎很容易弄的，蚝放下去煎一下，再放一些薯粉及鸡蛋下去煎几下，不就行了吗？”但，您弄出来的蚝煎好难吃哦，不过我们还是吃了。我们说到芋头糕的时候，一定不会忘记您的招牌小食，因为您做的芋头糕最好吃。

我当然不会忘记，小时候，您逼我吃饭的那很凶的样子。还有，您每逢新年都会做 Kuih Bangkit 来卖，而赚到的钱又会用来买衣服给我们。我不会忘记我五岁那年，您跌倒，跌得头破血流，满地都是血，而我不知所措，只好在神台前大哭大叫，求观音保佑，还好观音慈悲，让邻居路过，听到我的哭叫声，才会把您送到医院去。您进医院的次数还真多，怎么这样？每次都爱弄到大家焦急。还记得那次2005 年，医生说您不行了，赶去医院时看见您心跳每分钟一百八，那种辛苦的样子，看了真是让我当场崩溃大哭，还被同学看到。那时，我真的以为您会离开我们，那种即将失去而无法挽留的心情是言语无法形容的。奇迹似地，您又从获健康，出院了。那次以后，我好像渐渐就忘了要珍惜身边的人。总爱抱着“还有以后”的心态，我说我工作了，要买东西给您吃，可是却一拖再拖，就到我离开家，要去大学的那个时候。那时虽然您已经不太清醒了，我临走前还泪汪汪地跟您拍了张照，若没记错，好象是我们仅仅的一张合照。只可惜，那时，您或许都不知道为什么阿杨在哭，为什么要跟你拍照。那时还告诉自己假期回家时一定要买东西给您吃，可是，万万没想到，我都没机会了。为什么要那么早走呢？待久一些，不好吗？不想看我毕业吗？不想看我带女朋友回来给您看吗?不想要看到我工作的模样吗？怎么不留久一点呢？怎么不要我请您吃呢？

阿婆，虽然以上的问题，我都知道，您的答案会是“要，很想！”；但生死不由我们做主，人就是如此地渺小，怎么想多看身边的人几眼都没有权利，就像我现在想在被您骂，被您笑，想吃您的芋头糕的权利也没有？我会好好的，只是因为今天是您的死祭而我又无法回家为您上香，而感到遗憾，才会难过流泪，就像去年您去世时我也没办法回家送您最后一程。怎么每次我都无法出席这些重要的仪式？好遗憾，也非常地愧疚，没办法向您敬礼，只能隔空向您说谢谢。谢谢您，阿婆。

《康熙来了》，让我有所感触。。。

明天又考试，可是却不知为什么一点都不累。或许读了书以后，头脑都塞满了那些很烦的东西，所以睡不着吧。想着想着，不如看一集的《康熙来了》来娱乐一下自己！

因为前几天都有下载了好几集，所以就随便播了一集看看。这集的话题是“我发誓，我真的没男朋友！”，说的事几名女艺人已经单身好久的经历。原本这种话话题应该是蛮无聊的，因为总爱挖人家的是非来娱乐大众，真是缺德到极点；可是嘉宾当中有一位年纪比较大的，叫宝妈，她是个离了两次婚的人，两场婚姻都面对失败。

康，熙都一直在挖苦她，可是她也只能一笑置之，显得非常镇定，因为她哭过了。就算眼泪洗了她的眼睛，她也还是要面对现实。

嘉宾都是年轻貌美的女艺人，而且都是单身。只由她一位是结了两次婚，而且年纪比较大的。节目里大家都在聊对象要具有什么条件，很多都说了那些很梦幻的条件，比如高大威猛，又帅，又聪明，又有钱，又体贴。。。

宝妈听了就说：“这些都太梦幻了，你们如果真的跟着这些条件去找一个对象，那你们就打算不用嫁了！”。

听了宝妈的这番话，好像也在对着我说一样。朋友时常说我，我都口硬，不爱承认。可是，偶尔我也觉得自己太会挑了，就是“太梦幻了”，要有气质，要够高，又不可以太胖，又不可以太瘦，又不可以太爱撒娇，又不可以太自我，又不可以太没主见，又不可以太粗鲁，又不可以太天真，又不可以太木衲。。。可是，我就是这样难伺候，难满足，怎么办？难道我也打算不用取吗？哈哈。。。

咳，说真的，有时候，我自己想要什么我都不了解。要我把条件放低吗？有好像不太办得到。。。要跟着条件找吗？肯定找不到。。。所以，最好的是，跟着感觉走！哈哈，感觉最重要嘛。。。我等着的你，你在哪里啊？谁的心是我最后一站？咳。。。

人

为何一种米可以养百种人呢？那，又为什么百种人却不一定只吃一种米呢？

人，真的是很奇怪的动物。复杂，又难以了解。

有人勇敢追求爱情；有人却逃避。

追求爱情的人，可以不顾一切地往前冲，就算头破血流也不会畏惧。他知道他要的是什么，就算追求过程受伤，他也觉得无所谓。若受伤可以得来爱情，他宁愿遍体鳞伤。
逃避爱情的人，就算爱情像南瓜车般地来到了面前，他也会一笑置之。因为他知道，南瓜车虽然外表光鲜，十分迷人；但车里的人或许并没像那包装那么地吸引。

追求爱情的人，理智告诉他，爱情是他的梦。
逃避爱情的人，理智告诉他，爱情是他的梦；只不过他睡过头了。

追求爱情的人虽然清楚自己在做什么，但却不想清醒，因为他害怕付出一切后却一败涂地。
逃避爱情的人虽然清楚自己在做什么，但却很想不清醒，因为他希望他可以有一次盲目地勇敢。

求爱的人或许求了一生都求不到他要的爱。
躲爱的人或许躲了一生还躲不了他面对的爱。

既然各自有各自的痛，而各自的痛确是对方的乐，为何不要互补呢？
为何大家还要在圈圈里不停地独自晕眩，而却乐在其中呢？

雨后的心情

最近的天气真的很闷热，晚上的空气也总是很沉，开着四号风扇也会流汗。

刚才总算下了一场雨，是一场大雨，把周围的热气都散发了。

由于刚才下着雨的时候我在外面，正帮朋友庆祝生日。

也许最近比较忙，心情都处于比较紧张的状态。所以刚才坐着等候雨量变小的时候，突然觉得雨的声音很悦耳。

雨滴就像是一串短了弦的玻璃珠一样，一颗一颗地落在地上。发出来的声音也很响亮，就好像把我心底深处正在沉睡的我给唤醒了。

虽然刚才那场雨下得很大，可是我一点都不烦。反之，听着大雨的“沙沙声”，有一种莫名的舒畅，就好像大雨把我身上的不安及烦恼都洗得一干二净一样。

雨后的空气真的清凉许多，大地也好像有一种重生的感觉。人的心如果也有乌云，那人的心也会下雨，洗涤疲倦的心灵，那该有多好。

能吗？

之前说到我去国大中秋舞台表演的面试，结果入选了！心里非常高兴，因为这是难得的机会。

可是。。。

看着笔记簿的 To-do-list 上的功课慢慢地在增加，有一些tutorial及 assignment。实验又慢慢的全都开始了，从这个星期一开始，我一个礼拜要上四堂的实验。每次最快也需要两小时多的时间，再加上还有一天是九到五都在实验室里。做实验报告都做到手软了。。。

突然我心里感觉冷了。我应付得来吗？我能吗？

再看看日历，今天已经是八月了。月尾，期中考试将开始了！书没读到，有五科考试。。。

我原本兴致勃勃地，一心想要加入舞台表演；现在我却反复自问：到底这选择对不对？。我是不是有点犯贱，又自相矛盾？

可是，我又不想临阵退缩。唯有希望一切安好。

我是时候学会安排时间了。。。

The AUDITION

Today is the audition day for UKM's 30th Pesta Tanglung Stage Performance, and I decided to give it a try. We could audition for either acting or dancing or even both, but I chose acting because I don't think I can dance. I am stiff like a twig, xD...

It was a very fun day. First, we had a warm-up session which involved some free dance, and I was like "oh my God, I'd tried to avoid dancing and now I have to dance?"... But turned out, I love it...They played some random musics and we have to move accordingly to the music, each of us are given a chance to lead the dance. Too bad I got a slow, traditional Chinese music >< So sweat...-.-"

After that, we played a game, sumthing like hide-and-seek, but not exactly the same. This is to test how fast could we react... luckily i made it to the last few before losing, hahah... Then, my favourite part is up - the catwalk session. We are asked to walk in a very confident way and to behave like a supermodel, and the judges were there to observe our level of confidence...

The real audition followed. The chi kek part was this...a 2-minute background music was played, and we have to cry within that period of time... I cant...hahah... I thought I could cus I am quite emotional, but I failed. I was amazed by the spontaneity of a few girls who cried rightaway when the music had just started to play! Now I totally believe that a professional actor/actress has the capability to cry spontaneously... Well, seeing is believing.

Finally, we were asked to form a group of 2 for the interview session. Because there are odd numbers of contestants, I was in a group of 3. We are being interviewed by 4 teachers, and 1 of them asked :" Are you willing to cut your hair or even ugly-fy yourself for a character?" and I answered smoothly a yes...And now, I am a bit worried...hahah... I answered this question a little too soon without further considerations... We are required to sing a song as this year's performance is a musical show, so we are tested and considered based on our singing. After the interview, we have to put on a short act for about 1 minute and the story was about a quarrel, a quarrel between a parent (mother/father) and a son/daughter. For my group, we did the story of a son and a daughter quarrelling with their mother... We came up with quite a different story because we have 3 members and luckily we were given enough time to present the story well and the judges understood.

I think I did okay in the audition. I have no experience in such performance and I hope I am given a chance to try this once in my life...*Praying for the best, result will be notified within the next week*

Holiday Report

A summary of my activities in the 2-month holiday

Holiday, it’s over. Busy life, hello… 2 months, honestly, is not long but it’s not short either. Many things can be done in this time frame but not everything can be finished, of course. Time is always precious to me as I feel the urge of appreciating the present days and cherishing the youth we have now before you start to lose them one day.

Back to my hometown, one sure thing is FOOD, FOOD and FOOD. Going around tasting the delicious hawker foods and local delicacies is a very rewarding activity. Besides, this gives me a chance to take a good look of the place I once wanted to escape; yet I realize how much I like it now. The trip to Penang UNESCO sites was great, a chance to get together with old friends, jokes and laughter and the delicious foods we have tasted are a few things to enjoy. Penang deserves the title as a world heritage site. Now only I realize there are many old but unique buildings around Georgetown area. Therefore the city council should increase their effort in maintaining a clean city in order to parallel with its status as a world heritage site and to further push its popularity as an international tourist site.

Secondly, a holiday will surely be packed with gatherings with classmates and schoolmates. Most friends who are studying in overseas come back for holiday as well. So this is the time where most of the people are back to Penang and nevertheless, a good time for gathering. It brings back all the high school memories and funny stuffs among our friends besides giving us a chance to update our current status. I am grateful everyone is well and our friendship remains intact even if we do not meet each other as often as before. We went to Pantai Kerachut and this time, I was lucky enough to finally have the chance to watch baby turtles.

Hatchlings are kept in a big blue tank for a day before being released into the big blue sea. This helps to increase their survival rate in the cruel environment.

Baby turtles close up.

This is my first time of getting to see baby turtles. Too bad we are not allowed to touch them.

How could I forget about the movies and the cinema? In this entire holiday, I have finished watching a few drama series like Little Nyonya and 老婆大人。I watched 巾帼剿雄 halfway from the middle when I was back from my favourite campus, wow, love it! I watched a number of dramas as well. Angels and Demons, Night at the Museum 2, Terminator Salvation, 17 Again, Drag Me to Hell and TRANSFORMER 2: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN! Drag Me to Hell was okay, Angels and Demons is way better than The Da Vinci Code. 17 Again is a very nice show, very meaningful, makes me wan to be 17 again, but I cant...Transformer is nice, great technology on all the robotic moves and the fighting scenes and most of all, Megan Fox is hot!

Coming back to hometown allows me to spend more time with my family. I accompanied my mother to the dragon boat practice; an activity ran by the Cancer Link centre. I knew dragon boat all the time but never really have the chance to participate in this water sport. I am a fan of water sports and this is my chance to give it a try. Despite of the hot sun in the evenings, I found myself fell in love with dragon boat rowing. It’s a strenuous exercise and a good form of cardio. Definitely asking for more, but too bad, the practice is only once a week, so I only went there for about 6 times. I am looking forward to the year-end holiday for more dragon boat rowing. Consequences of this sport is that I've become even darker, but never mind.

I hit my 21st by 27th June. My birthday celebration with family and friends were great. My friends lit a BIG “21” using candles on the beach behind Crown Prince. This year I had the privilege for choosing my own present and I receive presents from my parents too. Thank you for all the presents.

A simple but special celebration at the beach near Crown Prince.

The BIG 21...

How it looks without the camera's flash light...

No mercy even on my birthday...TT being bullied even when taking pictures, haha...

T-shirt and shoes are from my dearest mummy, others are from friends. The picture does not show my complete present collection, sorry about that. I received another wallet from my dad and another t-shirt from my uni friends. Thank you!

回到大学

又是时间回来大学了。两个月的假期就此结束了。要离开家的时候，那种莫名的离愁又涌上心头了。好奇怪，已经离开家一年了，怎么还会这样？但不只是我一个人有这种感觉，是不是大家都还在学习独立，学习一个离开家的方式？或是我们的心都不曾真正地离开过温暖的家？

昨天爸和我一起过来。这次我驾车下来，所以爸就教我该走哪条大道，什么状况又该拿什么主意。前天也刚学会如何换轮胎。突然发现自己虽然二十一了，但还有很多东西都不懂。其实，我最近发现近几年我都不太开心的原因是我沉没在成年与少年的那种尴尬之中。像这次驾车下来，我就已经烦恼了很久，烦着汽油的消费，烦着如何控制自己的消费。现在我搬出来住了，住宿费方面明显地增加，再加上汽油的费用，我担心自己会花得太多。在这件事看来，我像个大人，因为我会为我自己的金钱担心。但实际上，我不知道要怎么规划我的消费，就像个挥霍的少年。我还是很容易被怂恿去做很多花钱的事，我还是个不会赚钱的花钱工具。我很讨厌这种感觉。

想了很久，也忍了很久；但一直都把一切藏在心里。

直到前几天，妈载我去吃午餐时，在车上突然向我说：“哼，你的病又来了？”

“哈？什么病？”

妈就笑着说：“这是你爸说的，他说你每次要回去的时候就会板着你的苦瓜脸，然后就会变哑吧，不能出声。”

这确实是我的“病”。我每次要回来时都会这样，我得心情都会很灰。我平时都抱着抱喜不报忧的心态去面对我父母。不是想要隐瞒，只是不想他们多心。这次刚好妈提起了，我就破例一次。或许是我面对得很累了，所以就说出来。

“我不是伤心，只是我怕这次回去，我会花得太凶。怕我驾车去，油钱会很贵。”
我妈听了，沉默了一瞬间，然后就说：“该花的就花吧！不该花的，能免的则免。就这样啊！”
我听了，便沉默了好久。她又接着说：“家里不富有，一路以来都这样啊，不就用以前的花钱方法就行了吗？别想那么多啦。”

这件事很快就传到爸那边去了。晚上，爸就跟我说了一翻话。我听了，觉得他是要我自己找出一个平衡点。人生不容许你拥有很多的一切，但并不代表你不能拥有一切，只是一些东西会拥有得少一些，有些东西拥有得多一点，自己就要选择自己要什么多一点，做出对的选择。就像我妈说的，该花的就花；不该花的，能免则免，本来就是这样。

摊开心门的舒畅

好久没有这种感觉,
如此地自在,
如此地无束.

带着面具的生活真的很辛苦,
整天自欺欺人,
根本就不快乐,
甚至令我感到生活很厌倦,
每天都很不期待明天的来临.

但现在,
我把面具摔破了.
是你让我知道何为真心.
再难听的话,
再残酷的事实,
都得说出口,
这样彼此才称得上真心朋友.

谢谢你的坦白.
我知道我自己的缺点,
然而我只会听到别人在我背后的批评及讽刺.
我会积极改变自己.

我终于感受到久违的痛快,
也是摊开心门的舒畅.

Holiday post

It has been quite awhile since my last post. my frens said tat my blog is only meant for uni destress purposes, haha, i guess i know y they say so. cus i only update my blog during my schooling days.

The 3-week job was good as i did learn quite a lot from it, despite it's a short period of time. seen many new things tat i've studied b4 but nv really see them, eg. HPLC (High Performance Liquid Chromatography), GCMS (Gas Chromatography Mass Spectrometer), LCMS (Liquid Chromatography Mass Spectrometer), fluoroscent HPLC and many other machines used in the analysis of biological n chemical samples, tableting machine and dissolution machine. Too bad thr is no electron microscope in the lab, so i dun hav the chance to see tat. Too bad i could jus see the machines but din really use them before. i also witnessed how they carry out BE (bioequivalence) study in GH.

Holiday has started 3 weeks ago. but it seems to me tat it has jus begun as i was working in may n now tat i've stopped working, i truly feel the freedom n leisure of a typical holiday...well, one good thing is tat i can catch up my pace with the series i hav once watched n stopped watching. but i afraid tat i might run out of series to watch. anyone has any good series to suggest?

如果

如果当初没那么多顾虑,
也许今天就不会那么心酸.

如果当初勇敢一点,
也许今天会幸福一点.

如果当初靠近一点,
也许今天会亲密一点.

如果当时冲动一些,
也许今天会美好一些.

如果那时天真一点,
也许今天就会成熟一点.

如果那时诚实一点,
也许现在不必欺骗自己.

如果那时盲目一点,
也许现在没那么麻木.

如果时间可以倒退一点,
也许我希望会是三年前.

如果能够回去,
我希望我能够把如果变成结果.

只恨时间不顾一切往前奔,
没说出的心声早已变历史...

而我,
只能从历史中吸取经验,
这样才能拥有下一片天空.

没有感觉

夜，渐渐深了，
但我依然不想睡。

不知道为什么，
贪睡的我竟会这样？

什么都不想做，只想听歌，
因为跟着歌词及旋律漂浮觉得非常自在。
此时此刻，我竟然可以感受到没有感觉的感觉。

只需跟着一字一词的流动，
无需费神用力的感觉真好。

心中的男女朋友

这不是出自我的手笔，只想跟大家分享，因为觉得很有意思。




“ 每一个女孩的身边都有一个不是男朋友的男朋友（或者相反的）。
但是，为了什么原因你们没能在一起？
也许他为了朋友之间的义气，不能追你。
也许为了顾及家人的意见 ，你们没有在一起。
也许为了出国深造，他没有要你等他。

也许你们相遇太早，还不懂得珍惜对方。

也许你们相遇太晚，你们身边已经有了另一个人。

也许你回头太迟，对方已不再等待

也许你们彼此在捉摸对方的心，而迟迟无法跨出界线。

不过即使你们没在一起，
你们还是保持了朋友的关系。

但是你们心底清楚，
对这个人，你比朋友还多了一份关心。

即使不能跟他名正言顺的牵着手逛街，
你们还是可以做无所不谈的朋友。

他有喜欢的人，你口头上会帮他追，
心里却不是很清楚你是不是真的希望他追到。

他遇到困难时，
你会尽你所能的帮他，不会计较谁又欠了谁。

男女朋友吃醋了，你会安抚他们说你和他只是朋友，
但你心中会有那么一丝的不确定。

每个人这辈子，心中都有过这幺一个特别的朋友，很矛盾的行为。

一开始你不甘心只做朋友的，
但久了，突然发现这样最好。

你宁愿这样关心他，
总好过你们在一起而有天会分手。

你宁愿做他的朋友，彼此不会吃醋，
才可以真的无所不谈。

特别是这样，你还是知道，他永远会关心你的。
做不成男女朋友，当他那个特别的朋友，有什么不好呢？

你心中的这个特别的朋友...? 是谁呢？

很多的感情，都因为一厢情愿，
最后连朋友都当不成了

常常觉得惋惜，
可惜一些本来很好的友情

最后却因为对方的一句喜欢你，如果你没有反应，
这一段友情似乎也难以维持下去，
这也难怪有些人会因此不肯踏出这一步。

因为这就像是一场赌注，
表白了之后不是成了男女朋友，
要不就连朋友都当不成了。

有些事不是你能预料的，或许对方不在意，
你们还可以是朋友，但却已经不如从前的好。”





所以，你会怎么选呢？

雨天

雨季，
带来了滋润的雨滴，
为小草带来希望，
为绿叶带来春天。

对我而言，雨季使人心烦，
因为雨天
使我没得去郊外游玩，
使我提不起精神，
使我心情变得灰灰的。

雨天的情景令人感到低落。

每当嘀嗒声响起，
我都不由自主地想起过去。
想起从前的我，
重温过去的美景，
拾起遗失的美好。

我仿佛坐上了时光轮，
回到过去。
画面是如此地清晰，
一幕一幕的往事像流星般划过心海，
感觉是如此地美妙。

有人，爱不顾一切地狂奔；
有人，则爱频频回首而默默前进。

雨天，让我知道，我原来是第二种人。

过去，对我而言是安宁的。
我喜欢缅怀，
因为一路走来，
沿途的风景让我感到我的存在价值。
前路去向渺茫，

往未知的方向前去，

而不断自我揣测
令我感到疲倦。

我累了，可以脱下面具吗？
可以赤裸裸地把心摊开吗？

可以随心所欲吗？
就像大地迎接雨滴一样，
如此潇洒，如此豪放。

人生，

不是应该这样吗？

long time no post...

It has been weeks since my last post. Time flies n im always busy, i dunno y. mayb it's becus of my tight schedule n also tonnes of notes to b read n memorised (biodiv is a stupid subject!) n also a few assignments r getting closer to their deadlines...buuuurrrhh, kinda hate this feeling, but at the same time kinda like it alot! cus when im busy, i dun spend most of my time thinking abt things tat cannot b answered, or at least, cannot b answered now.

hmmm, i would like to confess here, haha, though im not a christian n im not in a church as well, that i did sumthing bad the day b4 (13feb, friday). i ponteng-ed 2 classes to go sing K wif my college-mates...hahah. well, its my first time of doing so, never do tat b4...anyway, i really enjoyed the session, unwound n had so much fun. luckily i went for it; at first i din feel like going but then, im not regret i went. it was in this session tat i noe im not the mic-grabbing-champion! haha, one of my mates is unbelievable n we had "wars" for grabbing the mic over. haha...n also, tat was a very cheap entertaiment cus sumthing went wrong wif the system of redbox(the gardens) n it continues to play our selected songs even after the provided hours. we were supposed to end at 6pm but we sang until 7pm. hahah, so damn worthwhile! n actually we could continue to sing, however, we left at 7pm cus we were all so damn hungry...too bad...

today, i went to mid-valley, again. haha, this time wif my fren, seong to buy sum presents for our fren hooi. we bought the present in an unexpectedly short time n we had troubles on where to go n wat to do...haih, mid-valley is kinda boring actually...hooi arrived few hours later n we had lunch together at kim gary. we chatted for awhile then we went to pet's world to see the aquarium. it's so beautiful n it gave me a chance to "revise" my biodiv lessons, hahah, telling them wat r the phyla n classes of the animals they belonged to...haha.

after 2 days of joy, HERE COMES THE DAYS OF ULTIMATE SUFFERING AND CONTINUOUS TORTURE! mid-sem exam is jus around the corner, n i'll b eating books every now n then! so damn hate it for this semester, so much things to b memorized, biodiv, microbiology, cellular bio, phy chem, analytical chem...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, so hate it! but still, i nid to sit for it. so...no point complaining, but it makes me feel better. I WILL SURVIVE!

我的新年假日...只不过如此

好久没写部落格了, 趁今天是人日, 那就在此祝大家生日快乐,新年进步, 心想事成, 身体健康吧! 哈哈, 可能你们不懂什么是人日吧, 其实我也不太知道, 只知道初七是人的生日.

不知道是不是人"老"了, 过年的快乐也随着一起"老"了, 热不起来, 也许是因为去年外婆的去世使到整个新年气氛大大减少了吧! 也可能是自己想太多了吧! 总是搞到自己心情总是灰灰地.

原本还没回家的那几天, 在大学时还会很兴奋, 不时会唱起新年歌来娱乐自己, 去广场购买新衣时还喜气洋洋地; 到了年初一时却没什么兴奋感, 新年只不过比较塞车及多人群而已. 原本还以为今年可以真的体会到团圆饭的团圆意义; 谁知弟弟又得工作, 结果我们得迟回, 所以团圆饭就迟吃了, 不过免强算是团圆了吧!

昨晚去了极乐寺, 至少有感受到一些新年气氛啦! 好漂亮哦, 看了突然觉得槟城很有特色, 我的家乡好特别诶! 回去那边, 就没得看这些了...嗨...

明天就要离开这个美丽的家乡了, 很不舍得喔, 明天是初八了, 晚上就拜天公了, 我今年不能拜, 也没得逗留在这里... 槟城福建人居多, 拜天公很热闹, 这是我第一年没得感受到这里的气氛, 现在我才会珍惜啊! 所以我们要好好的享受当下, 以免日后埋怨... 接下来应该会很忙, 而且回去又快要期考了, 没得像上个学期一样, 可以时常回家了. 所以, 槟城, 四月见咯!

珠光宝气 与 我

相信爱看连续剧的港剧发烧友都会追看 《珠光宝气》吧！我也在追看着。我觉得剧情很好，而且里面有很多我本身很欣赏的演员，比如蔡少芬，陈豪及李斯琪。很多人都很肤浅，说这套戏的导演怎么选这么多“老女人”来演；我觉得明星的演技重要过他们的外貌及年龄，尤其是这种剧情以现实生活息息相关的连续剧。有好的演技，剧情才会显得真实，动人。

它能够让我更了解到上层人物的生活点滴。虽然他们很富有，但他们也仍然有自己的难处及问题，而这些都是钱解决不到的。而且上层人的关系都很复杂，在商场上既是朋友，更是敌人。生活都少不了勾心斗角，明争暗斗。看来，要当个直来直往，不顾世事的有钱人还真不可能。

除此之外，这套戏令我对做生意很有兴趣，你们可以说我孩子气，太容易被剧情所影响，但我真的觉得做生意是赚钱最快，最多的方法。你想想，若你跟公司打工，年薪会有多高？好，给你一年一百二十千；也就是说月薪是十千。但你能不能告诉我，每间公司会有多少这么高薪的职位呢？那你又能否符合它所需的条件呢？

做生意就不同，当然，我们要实际，我不说《珠光宝气》里那些大集团的生意，我们说小型的。我本身对饮食很有兴趣，也对这方面有稍微的研究。我总觉得人们可以不买衣服，不去玩乐，不去看电影；但他们不能不吃。而且，我发现到，只要你卖的东西价钱大众化，就算经济不好，人们还是会光顾。不信吗？看看 Kim Gary 及 Oldtown。这两间连锁店已经是很好的例子了。我不管在槟城或吉隆坡，经济好坏，每次经过这两间店都看到来客如云。Kim Gary 还离谱到要排长龙。

所以，我的想法就是：我要做饮食生意！我要开一间餐厅！哈哈。。。我不要读书了！













没有啦！说说罢了嘛。。。书还是要读的。。。不过饮食生意我真的很有兴趣，觉得这是行得通的想法。所以，你们谁有兴趣合伙做生意的可以找我！哈哈。。。那我们就合作愉快咯！嘿嘿。。。

College or move out? It's a clear decision...

This is the second semester of the first academic year, which means that after this semester, we will have to decide whether to stay in college or not. Staying in college requires us to be active in college's activities. So, if I want to continue to stay, I must be active.

Well, here's a thing about college. Everything has its pros and cons and the one thing I like about college is that you have more friends and it is near to my faculty, because it is inside the campus. Because I am staying in college, I get to know many people from different facs, and we even have like our own family there. It gives me the slight feeling of belonging, which I have been seeking ever since I am here. The time for me to walk from my college to my fac is only about 10 minutes, so this allows me to go back to my dorm to have a nap in the evenings after lectures. Haha, I know I am like a pig, just can't help it, sleep is important, okay...And also, the fees are kinda cheap over my college, in fact, the cheapest of all, the rate is RM2.50 per day! RM2.50 only!



The cons of staying in college are, well, way more than its pros. Below are the list:



1. You might get a sucky roommate. But luckily, I have a good one.

2. The food they sell in the cafe is awful and unhealthy. Trust me, my hair (not my pubic hair! =P) has been dropping like hell since last semester, and I finally realize that the culprit is ajinamoto!

3. Sharing toilets and bathrooms with 32 people is insane. Maybe because I am the type of fussy person, so I always feel ridiculous to share toilets n bathrooms with so many people. I enjoy shower very much and this sharing thing has stopped me from enjoying my shower because there is only 3 bathrooms, 1 has got no dorr, we are left with 2, not to mention one of the door is spoilt...it sucks.



4. Cold water kills me! Imagine, you have class at 8am and you are having cold water shower, it's fucking freezing cold! I always have flu in UKM because of this!



5. The bathrooms are always filled with water. The drain is always blocked, it makes the bathroom so damn messy. Ironically, a bathroom is a place for you to clean yourself, but the place itself is so filthy.




See! It's so fucking disgusting! eeee...


6. I can't cook in my dorm. There is no refrigerator, I cannot store meat, chicken, fish...fruits need to be eaten within 1 day! Even if I can cook using electrical cooker, I will have to go in and out of the room so oftenly that it disturbs my roommate, because the tap is outside.



7. The furnitures are limited and we cannot change its positions. Sometimes it is hard to arrange things because of its fixed position.



8. The lights are dimmed. I always feel that my room is very dark even with the lights on.



9. This is the worst of all: we have to move everything out from our room for every semester holiday! This is a shitty rule. I bring many things to make myself feel like I'm at home and to live a better life and this rule sucks! I was like crazy last semester, moving my things away, luckily my senior is kind enough to help me.



So, after analyzing the situation, I have decided to move out! Maybe the rental fees could be a little bit higher, but there are a lot of advantages. Bottom line, the 9 disadvantages about college I've mentioned above will not a problem anymore. The only problem is that I must have a mean of transport, that's all. So I planned to bring a bike here for the coming semester. I must try to ride again, because it has been ages since my last ride. LOL...



Hopefully, my parents would understand the reason I decide to move out and agree with me.







I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THE COMING SEMESTER!!! Yippy...

A kitten n its mummy...which impressed me

Eversince i hav step on the ground of UKM, im annoyed whenever i see stray cats loitering around. they get on my nerves, especially when there is a cat fight at nite, so damn annoying n i cant get into sleep...besides tat, in UKM, i've heard alot of ridiculous stories about cats, like how they grab food from cafes, how they get into others' rooms n the funniest of all, how a cat slept on my fren's bed, right beside his head, for one whole nite...LOLz...

Last semester, i saw a female cat, pregnant, n i was thinking damn...more of these little bullies r on their attack...n poof, 5 kittens were given birth, luckily, 5 of them were collected n sent off, i dunno where they are now, but i dun think they were killed, cus MALAYS LOVE CATS in a very unreasonable way, if not over the edge sumtimes.

Anyway, today, i was surprised when i saw A kitten near the garbage bin of my block, just one...weird, cus they normally give birth to more than one. a very young kitten, its legs barely step frimly on the ground, crying miserably for food i supposed...

the poor kitten...

its size relative to the polystyrene food container

face-to-face shot

Its crying made me feel sympathetic to it n i almost feed it wif my precious milk supply...but i didnt, bcus that would attract more cats n this would b bad. but still feel bad for it, he is so little n is abandoned, cus i saw no adult cat in the surrounding areas...

I went out to make an evening tea for myself n suddenly i saw a black cat came by, looking fierce, its green eyes stared at me sharply, as if it was going to kill me!! i knew she's the mother! minutes later, she carried the kitten away, HER kitten.

the pictures r blurred, sumthing went wrong wif the focus...but u still can see 2 figures claerly.

she carried it away..."bitting" the kitten's neck.

My guess is that the kitten must hav lost its way home n its mother finally found it. the scene makes me feel relieved, bcus the baby found its mother! n also it shows the nature of how a mother protects her babies...MOTHERS R GREAT PPLE!!!

...

...

...

seems unfair to daddies...PARENTS R GREAT PPLE!!! well, generally,hehe...not to those involved in domestic violence.

Welcome 2009! Happy New Year everyone!

Happy new year everybody! may u guys have health, luck n wealth in 2009...

i went for the countdown in KL, wif my college-mates...we went to pavilion, though some of them would prefer to go to sungai wang, bcus we want to AVOID THE STUPID SNOW SPRAY...AGAIN! haha, cant believe tat im always trying my best to avoid the spray...so sick of it, i dun wan to hav the penang xmas countdown-all-over-again feeling in KL...